Developer Despair Sprint Names

The largest genre by a wide margin, which is either a comment on the profession or on whoever maintains this register. These are not names about a sprint's goal. They are names about the code the sprint has to touch.

The vocabulary is git, blame and time. Past Me Was an Idiot, Future Me’s Problem, Commit Archaeology. Several are things a developer has genuinely said out loud, transcribed without alteration and improved only by being printed on a board where management can see them.

Issue when

The sprint is being spent inside a subsystem nobody volunteered for.

Withhold when

The code in question was written by someone in the room, last month. Aim this at an inheritance, not a colleague.

Selected entries

1. Must Be DNS11

   It usually is.

2. Works on My Machine19

   The oldest entry here, and still the shortest route to a productive argument.

3. Waiting for Godot.js20

   The register's only literary reference that also compiles.

The other 7 genres

If this is not the register you needed, the rest are one click away. All 385 names sit together on the complete register.

Reading a list is not the same as being handed a verdict. The generator convenes a committee, deliberates briefly, and stamps exactly one name — and it remembers which ones you have already had, so it keeps serving fresh ones until the genre runs dry.